cancer Archives - Page 4 of 5

The Thaw

March 25, 2024October 9, 2017 by Kelly Inselmann

The days seemed endless, and Michele marked them off in her calendar like a prisoner records days of a long sentence on the wall. Six months of weekly chemo followed by 6 months of infusions every few weeks. In between, there was surgery and radiation. She resisted anything slowing down her progress. She focused on the day she was declared free of the cancer and free to get her life back.

At the end of active treatment, little things that used to annoy her, barely registered. She had more perspective about what is important: family, health, showing compassion for herself and others.

Michele survived emotionally with positive affirmations and faith, and by sheer grit: grinning and bearing it. To assuage the worry and fear of others, she often appeared cheerful, squelching pain, disappointment, grief and anger.

In the months following the end of treatment, she begins to feel easily irritated, fatigued and emotional. She has trouble containing her feelings, and they erupt in a flash of anger or tears at inopportune moments. She’s hard on herself for lacking gratitude. She worries her lack of positivity will bring the cancer back.

Michele is not alone! In my Yoga and Talk® Groups and Classes for Cancer Survivors, I see this phase of recovery often and I call it “the thaw.”

The thaw can occur anytime during or after treatment and is hard to predict.

The shock and emotional numbness that offered (unconscious) protection from the trauma begins to wear off, often unevenly. Sometimes, you feel positive and grateful, other times the future seems plagued with danger and endless fear of recurrence. Effort can feel meaningless, your feelings raw or simmering below the surface.

You know how when your foot falls asleep and then you try to walk and you have to take your time and it’s awkward and uncomfortable? The emotional thaw is similar in that you have to take your time and people may need to wait.

While it can be deeply unsettling, in my experience, it’s also a signal that you are ready for emotional healing.

As your heart thaws and you come to terms with the reality of what happened to you, give yourself as much permission as possible to rest and allow the sensations and feelings to emerge, be understood and healed.

Here are a few ways to be kind to yourself during the thaw:

Know that tears are the body and mind’s way of cleansing. It’s a way of integrating your experience, so the thought and feeling are not separated inside you. If you need to cry, cry until the tears are gone for the moment. Don’t try to stop the tears. Stay with the feeling. It won’t last forever. Michele recently told me that she lets herself cry in the house, car, and shower. When the tears come, she welcomes them and tries to squeeze every last one out. Sometimes people cry in yoga class or in my groups and because they are in public, they try to turn it off and feel embarrassed. At least in my classes, I say bring it on – it’s a sign that you are cleansing and integrating.
Find ways to discharge grief and anger physically, through exercise or art.
Vent to a trusted friend or support group. Be willing to name what you are actually feeling and be heard. If someone can’t be there for you, don’t blame yourself. But look for others who can be present even when you are sad or angry.
Seek out a therapist to help you piece together the cancer experience in the context of your life. Is there unresolved prior trauma that has been triggered and now needs healing as well? Do you need help sorting through complex relationships?
If you can’t stop crying or raging, and I mean 24/7, not just allowing the tears to flow, or if you are not sleeping at all, PLEASE see a therapist or doctor. There is much support to be gained.
Look for community where you can show up exactly as you are in this moment, transformed. Both the same and different from how you were before cancer.
Get bodywork – massage, acupuncture, physical therapy, yoga. Your experience has been stored in your body and will benefit from gentle care.

It’s messy to thaw out and more than a little painful. But to gain vitality and wellness, the thaw is essential. Grief and anger must be felt, not stuffed inside or disowned, only to leak out or keep you numb. And you must be supported in this process-don’t isolate.

Deeper emotional healing, truer relationships, and re-connecting with the pulse of your life is on the other side.

Over the next 6 months, I’m going to focus on the Role of Emotions in Healing. I hope you will join the conversation by leaving me a comment on the website about your experience with the thaw and questions about feelings and cancer and how they relate.

On Asking for Help

March 25, 2024September 25, 2017 by Kelly Inselmann

“Your hand opens and closes, opens and closes. If it were always a fist or always stretched open, you would be paralyzed. Your deepest presence is in every small contracting and expanding, the two as beautifully balanced and coordinated as birds’ wings.” RUMI

It can be hard to accept that you need help. But to survive and thrive, you must to be willing to ask directly for what you need and to accept what is offered with grace (not guilt). Consider that being a gracious receiver is itself a gift and can bring pleasure to the one who gives.

This yogic exercise embodies the natural rhythm of opening and contracting, giving and receiving. There must be balance between giving and receiving. Too much receiving and you are full, too much giving and you are depleted of energy and resources.

Be fearless and honest about asking the Infinite and your community for what you need to make it through the day or the week! And as you are able, pass it on…

Overcoming Panic and Anxiety

September 11, 2017September 11, 2017 by Kelly Inselmann

Feeling anxiety or panic?

Try this simple but powerful breath exercise from kundalini yoga for overcoming a panic or anxiety attack.

Cancer survivors and others will benefit from learning this practice to quickly gain better control of their breathing and relax the mind.

The sips are many little bitty sips like you are trying to suck the last bit of liquid through a straw. Keep sipping until you have taken in as much air as you comfortably can. Then suspend the breath in for a few moments before exhaling smoothly through the nose. Repeat as many times as you want.

Embracing Life

March 25, 2024August 5, 2017 by Kelly Inselmann

Give yourself permission to enjoy life and choose activities that bring you pleasure and joy, even if outside your comfort zone. Cancer Survivors sometimes blame themselves when they feel fatigue or pain after doing activities that are important for their vitality. How can we both accept our vulnerabilities and be willing to embrace life?

Caring for Physical Vulnerabilities

July 17, 2017 by Kelly Inselmann

Cancer survivors are often faced with ongoing side effects from medical treatment that they did not expect. How can we acknowledge the reality of our side effects and limitations and continue to live and stretch ourselves? This video talks about the dilemma survivors face and ends with a short meditation for accepting ourselves as we are.

Beyond Pleasure and Pain

March 25, 2024July 10, 2017 by Kelly Inselmann

Cancer Survivors (like all humans) are often moving emotionally between feelings of gratitude and difficulty tolerating discomfort or pain. We long to hold on the the moments of pleasure and turn away from discomfort. Learning to observe the present moment helps us to tolerate and sometimes even appreciate what is happening. Short guided meditation. www.joybootsforcancersurvivors.com

Being in Nature

July 10, 2017June 28, 2017 by Kelly Inselmann

I’m in the Catskill Mountains this week enjoying nature. This video is a chance to practice being with the thoughts and feelings within you and appreciating nature.

Tips for Sleep

March 25, 2024June 19, 2017 by Kelly Inselmann

After my weekly Wellness Warriors Yoga Class, a new student asked for ideas to help her sleep. A four time cancer survivor, she says she falls asleep ok, but wakes around 3am and lies sleepless for hours.

Insomnia-it’s the worst! I would wager that the majority of cancer patients and survivors experience it, as well as many in the general population.

Yogic postures, meditations, and lifestyle practices can help foster sleep.

This week, I’m sharing three (of the many) that you can do next to your bed when you experience sleeplessness:

1.Forward Bends-forward bends help you relax. Come into a gentle forward bend and begin to breathe long and deep. Enjoy breathing and your ability to stretch, no matter how far forward you come. Stretch one leg at a time to protect your lower back if you have pain or concerns about lower discs.

2.Table pose. Place your hands under your shoulders and your feet beneath your hips. Press the hips up until they are parallel to the floor. Look up at the ceiling. Eyes can be open or closed. Breathe long and deep and stay with the posture until you can no longer hold the position. Come down from the posture and relax a few moments. Then resume the posture. Continue to release tension by coming into the posture with slow, deep breathing until you find yourself worn out and ready to meditate.

3.Meditation for Sleep

This meditation uses 2 mantras from Kundalini Yoga as Taught by Yogi Bhajan: Sa Ta Na Ma (Cycle of Life-Life, Birth, Death, Rebirth) and Wahe Guru (expression of ecstasy and connection with the Infinite).

You can sit up in bed or sit on the floor or in a chair.

It has 4 parts:

First, take 4 even sniffs in through the nose. With each sniff, think to yourself one of the syllables of the mantra: Sa Ta Na Ma.

Then, suspend your breath in and think to yourself 4 rounds of Sa Ta Na Ma.

Next, exhale though the nose as you think to yourself Wahe Guru.

Eyes are either gently closed or focused at the tip of your nose.

In this short video, I explain the meditation and postures for relaxation.

https://www.youtube.com/edit?o=U&video_id=KBb-LW20U0U

Let me know your experience, questions, and need for modifications. Sweet dreams to you!

Act of Rebellion

March 25, 2024June 12, 2017 by Kelly Inselmann

The news is troubling to me. And I know I’m not alone.

I hear from friends and clients who also worry about our country’s leadership, the economy, violence and oppression.

Among people touched by cancer, there is a genuine fear of losing health insurance benefits which could mean the difference between continuing to live and thrive and dying.

It’s a heavy situation. And yet, cancer survivors have faced heavy situations before. To survive and thrive, you must pace yourself. http://www.kellyinselmann.com/monday-morning-videos/learning-to-pace-yourself/

Rest is essential if you want to be strong enough to continue living and to stand up for yourself and others. Can you give yourself permission to nourish your body and mind by setting aside the unknowns and the fears for a few moments?

The rebel in me likes Child’s Pose.

I bring my forehead to the floor and feel relief. Closing my eyes, I temporarily

withdraw from resonating with the sorrows of the world.

Sitting on my heels, forehead to the floor, my arms are relaxed to the sides or along the floor above my head.

Knees are open to relax the hips.

In this era of “infomania,” we are stimulated by thousands of competing thoughts, fears, feelings, and ideas. There is much information and precious little understanding.

In this context, Child’s Pose is a subversive and vital act of rebellion.

Simple and intrinsic to our bodies; babies and children do it in their sleep and play.

In Child’s Pose, time slows down. I temporarily reject the outside world to experience my inner one. I feel grounded, connected to the earth, and aware of the sensations in my body.

Symbolically, it is a classic position of vulnerability and humility.Neck exposed, my head (and intellect) is momentarily surrendered. No more obsessing, problem solving, planning, attempting to control things.

In my Yoga and Talk ® Therapy Group, “Denise,” who suffers from chronic fatigue since her cancer treatment, feels a shift when she comes into Child’s Pose, dropping into her body and the felt experience of herself. She later describes child’s pose as a refuge– from her fearful thoughts about her condition, the expectations of others, and anxiety about the future. Over time, Child’s Pose has become an experience of safety she draws on when stressed or exhausted.

And for me, each time a group comes into this resting posture, or I do it myself, I feel the subversive power and potential that is cultivated through deep rest.

Which Side of Your NOSE are YOU Breathing Through? (and why is this important?!)

May 14, 2020June 5, 2017 by Kelly Inselmann

Before reading further, take a moment to feel connected to your body. Notice the sensations connecting you to a chair, the floor, or bed.

Breathe long and deep a few times, allowing your chest and belly to expand on the inhale like you are filling a balloon with air, and relax with the exhale.

Now bring your fingertips just below your nostrils and breathe out powerfully a few times. Can you discern which side of your nostrils is more open than the other at this moment? Left, right, or equal?

I’m going to share a secret about your body you probably never learned growing up or in school: several times a day, our bodies naturally change which nostril side is more open and easier to breathe through.

Why on earth is this important?!

Many of us, but cancer survivors in particular, struggle with fatigue, difficulty focusing, anxiety and insomnia.

Yogic breathing practices such as alternate nostril breathing can help you bring more prana (life force energy) into your body to manage the side effects of cancer.

At a given moment, the nostril side which is more open reveals the state of your mind and energy. You can even learn to track your mental state and physical energy by observing which side is more open or more blocked.

You have an incredible potential to change your state of mind and body by deliberately switching which nostril side is more open through alternate nostril breathing.

When I first learned about this and started using it in my daily life, I felt like I had a hidden superpower to lower stress, calm emotional reactions, make me more alert, reduce anxiety, and choose to focus.

But which side is which?

TO RELAX-Open the Left Side

When your left side is more open, you are usually calmer, more relaxed, less anxious. (You might also feel tired or sleepy, unfocused or fatigued). When the left side is more open, it is easier to fall asleep.

If you find yourself struggling to sleep, check which side of your nostrils is more open. With insomnia, based on my own experience, I can almost guarantee that the left side is blocked and the right side is open.

To encourage relaxation or sleep, block the right nostril and begin long deep breathing through the left. Continue for 3-11 minutes or until the dominance changes to the left. Lie on your right side to sleep, allowing the left nostril more ease at being open.

Anxiety: If you are feeling anxious during the day, check your nostrils. No doubt the right side is more open and the left side is blocked. Again, block the right side and begin long deep breathing through the left. You can practice anywhere!

Practice along with me to lower anxiety OR get ready to sleep by clicking here:http://www.kellyinselmann.com/monday-morning-videos/lower-anxiety-with-left-nostril-breathing/

FIGHT FATIGUE-Open the Right Side

When the right side is open, you are usually more alert and awake with higher energy. (You might also be feeling anxious or restless).

If you need to stay awake, drive, study, listen to a friend or client, care for a child, block the left nostril with your left thumb and begin breathing long and deep through the right side for 3-11 minutes or until the dominance switches to the right.

To wake up, energize your body, focus, become more alert OR to lift your mood, practice along with me by clicking here:http://www.kellyinselmann.com/monday-morning-videos/energize-with-right-nostril-breathing/

Believe it or not, there are some yogis who, with practice, can learn to switch the dominance of the nostril without even using the fingers to block one side. Through deep self awareness and attention they are able to open up one side or the other.

Let me know the results of your observations and experiments!