Can’t See the Path for the Fog

Last week in Austin we had several days where the fog hung low. Everything was gray, including my mood.

What was fogging my mind?

The effort it was taking to avoid listening to the news, one story after another about misguided “executive” orders that I know as a social worker are going to hurt very real people trying to live their lives with dignity and self respect.

Whether it’s cutting federal funds (university professors, veterans, disabled children who receive special education services) immigrants caught up in indiscriminate and inhumane actions, the removal of civil and labor rights protections at a federal level, and a list of other impulsive and destructive actions. Not to mention seeing nazi salutes performed without censure on huge national platforms.

My mind was foggy from the feelings I was trying not to have. Rage, disbelief, deep disappointment in people, fear for my daughter’s future, and wondering about the point of going through the motions of regular life when things seem on the verge of collapse.

My family’s day to day struggles from the cancer experience suddenly seemed less prominent to me.

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Joy Boots for Cancer Survivors

Encouragement, companionship, community and support for cancer survivors.

Invitation to Join JoyBoots Yoga and Talk Community

JoyBoots for Cancer Survivors is a program at the intersection of mental health, emotional wellness and the cancer experience.

I have 30 years of experience helping people recover from anxiety, depression, and trauma, and 17 years as a cancer survivor and caregiver.

As a clinical social worker and yoga therapist in private practice in Austin Texas I’ve offered cancer survivors yoga classes and therapy groups on a weekly basis for 15 years.

Join me in this JoyBoots community re-boot. No matter where you are in your own cancer or caregiving experience-whether 20 years out from treatment, or recently diagnosed-there is something for you in my 6 Principles for Emotional Health and Healing that I share in class and in posts.

Paid Subscribers (6$/month) have access to live JoyBoots Yoga and meditation classes on Wednesdays at 6pm CT (and recording).

To keep reading, consider being a JoyBoots subscriber.


Joy Boots for Cancer Survivors

Encouragement, companionship, community and support for cancer survivors.

Chaos on top of cancer?

Here’s what I’m thinking about the cancer experience this week.

Isn’t it bad enough you have to get yourself to appointments when its cold and rainy? And that you don’t feel your physical best?

But to see and feel impending doom in the country when you are worrying about just making it through the day?

It can be demoralizing.

Cancer doesn’t stop for politics and neither do your treatments (so far!), medications, or need for self care as you recover.

To stay buoyant, your body appreciates feeling grounded and your mind stabilized (or at least distracted in a positive way). When you can’t help yourself to do these basics for your health and healing, reaching out to your community is called for. And that’s what I’m doing today for my own mental health and yours if you think it’s right for you.

To keep reading, consider being a JoyBoots subscriber.


Joy Boots for Cancer Survivors

Encouragement, companionship, community and support for cancer survivors.

Softening into the New Year

Anger Shame Fear Sadness

Can you accept these feelings when they arise?
Ask yourself: Can I have the feeling of softening towards my very human feelings, no matter what they are?
Can I soften towards my Self for experiencing these feelings?
This is the beginning of compassion. A softening. A tenderness.
I took a week off over the holidays and then was back with clients the first week of January.

‘Tis the season’ for talking through family disruptions, sharing feelings, setting boundaries, as well as learning results from scans and diagnoses.

There’s a theme I’m noticing in myself and from the people around me and that is…can we soften?

Especially, can you soften your attitude towards yourself?

And your expectations of yourself?

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Joy Boots for Cancer Survivors

Encouragement, companionship, community and support for cancer survivors.

Living Well is an Art and a Practice

This year I needed a little tree and a BIG angel. And one who brings a bit of fierceness and strength.

It’s not just people touched by cancer who can move from one day to the next with additional layers of stress, worry and anxiety. It’s part of the human condition. Though the cancer experience (like other traumas) brings existential questions and your own mortality into stark relief.

Things may feel overwhelming, out of control and uncertain. Learning to be okay in the present moment, a witness to your life experience, is one of the benefits of practicing yoga and meditation.

When you bring your awareness to the present moment, you activate the part of your brain (the frontal lobe) that regulates and soothes emotions. You also increase the possibility of feeling compassion for yourself and others.

To keep reading, consider being a JoyBoots subscriber.


Joy Boots for Cancer Survivors

Encouragement, companionship, community and support for cancer survivors.

How to Put your JoyBoots On

Even before the term “toxic positivity” was coined, as I was going through treatment for breast cancer in 2008, I couldn’t stand the expectation that people with cancer should be cheerful warriors.

As a therapist and meditation teacher, I knew that repressing or disowning true feelings of shock, sadness, anger or fear does not keep these feelings away.

On the contrary, if you can’t name or express what you are feeling, and if you put on a happy face just to make others comfortable, the repression adds stress and inflammation to your body.

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Joy Boots for Cancer Survivors

Encouragement, companionship, community and support for cancer survivors.

Do you AVOID or do you OBSESS?

This is a trick question. Both have real benefits and both can lead you into dark places of isolation or overwhelm.

Even when the immediate danger is over, you can get stuck in what helped you survive a trauma or challenge.

How to get unstuck?

This is where my 6 Steps for Emotional Healing after Cancer (and any trauma) come in.

Avoiding and obsessing are psychological defense mechanisms used in difficult emotional experiences.

To keep reading, consider being a JoyBoots subscriber.


Joy Boots for Cancer Survivors

Encouragement, companionship, community and support for cancer survivors.

Finding Resilience in Uncertain Times

If you are a cancer survivor, you are used to living with uncertainty. But I’ve been hearing from so many people that the last few months have been even more difficult because of societal strife, stress, and fears about the future.

It’s the truth that things feel and are less predictable.

I don’t know how to fix it, but I do know I’m continuing to turn to my 6 Principles for Emotional Healing and Resilience.

They are not linear, but you do always have to start with getting real about what you are facing if you want to heal. (Scroll to the end for an exerpt from Step One in Healing Well).

Whether it’s contending with cancer or fearing for democracy (or any of the many other challenges of modern life), resilience lies in community, connection, and self expression (as well as the 3 Ms you learn in yoga-Movement, Mindful Awareness, and Meditation).

With things in our society seeming so disorganized, I’m making it my goal to contribute in the small ways that I can.

To keep reading, consider being a JoyBoots subscriber.


Joy Boots for Cancer Survivors

Encouragement, companionship, community and support for cancer survivors.

Ten Ways The Recent Election Is Like Being Diagnosed with Cancer

The biopsy came back and the news is not good.

Here are 10 things the election and a cancer diagnosis have in common:

  1. You hope for the best, fear the worst, can’t actually imagine it happening, and then it’s even worse that you thought.
  2. So much is beyond your control and you feel powerless to fix it.
  3. You keep forgetting, like when you are asleep. Then you wake up and there are a few moments before you remember. And then it’s like waking up into a nightmare.
  4. People don’t respond how you might have expected.  Some will disappoint or hurt you in their failure to empathize. Some will surprise you with their kindness by reaching out.
  5. You will need social support and connection.
  6. After the shock, when it sinks in, you will need to express your thoughts and feelings, not keep them inside to fester.
  7. Grief is natural and inevitable. So is anger. Let it out.
  8. You may get caught in anticipatory grief or fear. Do not dwell there. Find ways to appreciate and feel safe in the present moment.
  9. While you cannot fix the entire problem alone (I mean, only a crazy person would suggest that you can), there will be many things you can do to strengthen yourself and help others. Be proactive.
  10. Put your JoyBoots on. We have work to do and fun to have!

To keep reading, consider being a JoyBoots subscriber.


Joy Boots for Cancer Survivors

Encouragement, companionship, community and support for cancer survivors.

Jumping out of your skin?

This week, I came across a talk I gave to the International Association of Yoga Therapists on the subject of Discomfort. There’s ALOT of discomfort in the cancer experience that normal coping strategies simply do not address. And I’ve been hearing from JoyBooters that the election season has people more stressed than ever.

Listen to my Talk from 2018 about Discomfort and the ways that Getting Grounded, Becoming the Observer/Witness to your Experience, and Allowing Things to BE just as they are can help you contend with it. Even learn to Befriend it.

I feel even more strongly that this is what I need to focus on for my own mental and physical health at the moment. 

I do a simple yoga and breath work practice to discharge tension and anxiety, as well as to build back energy and courage. These also help me access my neutral mind where I can rest and become the observer which helps put things into perspective so I CAN enjoy the present moment.

Being in the NOW is easier with practice, designated spaces, and community. You have to be willing to show up for yourself and others.

To keep reading, consider being a JoyBoots subscriber.


Joy Boots for Cancer Survivors

Encouragement, companionship, community and support for cancer survivors.