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Celebrating 10 Years ❤️

September 28, 2020 by Kelly Inselmann

I completed a grueling year of treatment for Stage 3 breast cancer in 2008. I was overjoyed and grateful to be finished. What I wasn’t prepared for was how difficult it would be to get my life back.

I was struggling with numerous side effects of surgery, chemotherapy and radiation including lymphedema, osteoporosis, a broken rib, fatigue, “chemobrain” and the common experience of depression and fear of recurrence.

I returned to my work as a psychotherapist, but wasn’t seeing cancer patients and survivors as clients because my own experience was still too fresh. But when I discovered kriya, I recognized the benefits for cancer patients and survivors.

Kriya for Immune Fitness is a practice you can do daily, as I did, to increase your energy and regain focus. Doing it every day for over a year, I found it ideal for the following:

managing mild lymphedema (in my arms and torso)
increasing mental and physical energy and conquering fatigue
consciously releasing tension, anger, pain and toxins
getting both sides of my body moving to decrease aches and pains and increase circulation
integrating the life changing ordeal I had been through
drastically reducing the depression and anxiety I felt

Ten years ago, in September 2010, I was eager to share a kriya yoga series I felt had been key to bringing back my energy. I began offering a free weekly class in South Austin through a nonprofit. At the beginning I had very few students, sometimes none, but I would still show up and practice the kriya on my own.

Over time, I developed a friendship with a member of the IV League, a support group for women living with Stage 4 breast cancer. Together, we decided to offer my class immediately before their weekly support group at Casa de Luz, the macrobiotic center. For several years, the class was mainly folks from the IV League group – a closeknit and inspiring group of women.

One day, a woman from Capital of Texas Team Survivor joined us. She loved the practice, especially Lion’s Breath, and she asked if Team Survivor could co-sponsor the group, help advertise, and pay me a small stipend. I gratefully accepted and the energy around the class began to grow as more people learned about it.

Eventually the local YogaYoga studio allowed us to offer our free class in their beautiful space. When the pandemic hit in March, everything moved to an online format and we persisted, meeting virtually on Zoom each week. We average about 20 students per class and have hundreds who cycle in and out.

Sometimes people ask me why I like working with cancer survivors, assuming it would be sad or depressing. For me, it’s the exact opposite. As one Joybooter remarked, “We get to embrace life in it’s most VIVID, being truly aware of life and its beauty and fragility every time we get together.” I am inspired by the depth of feeling, connection and openness people bring to the class each week. I am motivated by the peace and stability of mind, pain relief, community and healing they experience.

I thank everyone that has participated or supported me and the JoyBooter community over the years. Together, we lift each other’s spirits!

Please join me in celebrating our 10 year anniversary! Share the Joyboots website and Joyboots Facebook group with friends or colleagues. Since classes are being offered virtually, people can join from anywhere in the world and it’s always free.

Mamma Jamma is an amazing organization that has provided over $2 million in support for local programs and services for breast cancer fighters and survivors. Thank you for donating to Mamma Jamma to support my class, Team Survivor and other organizations providing crucial assistance to cancer survivors. You can still donate through November 30th to help me reach my fundraising goal of $1000.

Kundalini Yoga

September 10, 2020 by Kelly Inselmann

Many of you know that I have practiced and taught Kundalini Yoga for over 20 years. In the interest of being open with JoyBooters, I wanted to let you know that there is a lot of upheaval in the kundalini yoga community right now.

In January, a former student of Yogi Bhajan (who brought kundalini yoga to the West and died in 2006), wrote a book called Premka, about her life living communally with Yogi Bhajan from the late 60s-early 90s. She revealed that she was exploited and abused by him and she shares about her traumatic experiences.

When it was published, many other stories of abuse in the kundalini yoga community began to emerge.

I was shocked at the pervasiveness of the abuse and especially saddened and outraged to hear that many children who were sent to boarding school in India had been abused. At that point, I ended my affiliation with 3HO, the kundalini yoga organization, and stopped sending in dues payments. I also asked them to take responsibility, do a complete investigation and pay reparations to any children (now adults) who had been physically or emotionally injured.

The kundalini yoga organizations did solicit an investigation (which was released in July) and determined that the abuse alleged was very likely to have occurred. You can read more about it here: https://www.yogajournal.com/yoga-101/abuse-in-kundalini-yoga

Some in the community are denying the abuse and others are working on healing.

I believe every one of the survivors and am also appalled by the cover-ups that occurred. As a therapist and a human, I can only imagine the pain that was created.

I have been in dialogue with many other teachers about how to move forward with what we know works and the willingness to shed what does not.

I still believe in the value of integrating yoga, meditation, and psychotherapy. In many cases it has accelerated healing in people with severe depression, anxiety, PTSD from cancer or other trauma, or addiction, and helped people re-connect with themselves in ways that had previously been elusive.

I only teach what I have experienced personally and taught to hundreds of people over the years. I intend to keep teaching, free from dogma and the shadow of Yogi Bhajan, choosing practices that are especially effective for cancer survivors.

The yoga and meditation practices are simply tools for consciousness, they are not the consciousness itself. Consciousness is the state of being awake and aware.

I am happy to visit (talk and listen) with anyone individually or in a small group if you have questions or feelings that come up and you want to check in.

What Cancer Leaves Behind

August 31, 2020 by Kelly Inselmann

One of my former yoga students was featured in a video produced by the University of Texas Mental Health Channel. She eloquently shares her cancer story, shining light on what’s left behind after cancer, how her healing journey progressed and how it has impacted her mental health.

Among the symptoms, side effects and emotions that get left behind there is also hope and gratitude. Hope for better tomorrows. Hope for healthier tomorrows. Hope for happier tomorrows. Hope of lasting memories with loved ones. Hope for more birthdays. Hope for a fulfilling life. Hope for reaching dreams, even if differently than we imagined.

However you’ve been affected by cancer and wherever you are in your healing journey, I hope you’ll take time to watch this short video, What Cancer Leaves Behind.

And if you’re on your healing journey and curious to know how to use yoga as a tool, please join me in the free, online weekly yoga classes I teach every Wednesday at 12:00pm CT. Email me at kellyinselmanntherapy@gmail.com to get the link to join. I hope to see you there!

Limitless Possibility

August 3, 2020 by Kelly Inselmann

As humans, we all face physical limitations related to being mortal and facing our own mortality is a realization that brings all kinds of feelings – fear, grief, anger, denial, acceptance. But just as we must face certain limitations related to our human existence, there is also the potential for limitless possibility.

Dr. Atul Gawande, physician and author of Being Mortal, addresses the question:

How do we move through the world and keep taking action once we are so aware of our limitations, vulnerabilities and imperfections?

“We’re all so incredibly limited and yet there are ways that we string together and are almost unlimited as groups of people. It’s magic when that happens- when you all start pulling together and then you eradicate polio from the world, which we’re almost on the verge of doing.”

I love this wisdom from Dr. Atul Gawande where he describes how connection and community create a synergistic effect that gives us the feeling of growth and possibility, where creativity and new ideas emerge, and where we keep each other motivated and accountable to our missions in life. This is when the seemingly impossible can happen. As humans, we are all indeed imperfect, limited and uncertain of the future. When we lack connection we feel alone and more limited, but among a healthy community, we can help each other grow, expand, and heal.

If you’re not already a member of the Joy Boots for Cancer Survivors Facebook group, I hope you’ll join us right now. And if you know someone who could benefit from the healing powers of community, I hope you’ll share this post and ask them to subscribe.

Sneak peek at a chapter I’m contributing to a book

May 25, 2020 by Kelly Inselmann

Sometimes feelings or experiences can be so painful, so traumatic, that to survive, you shut them down and attempt to block them from your awareness. When I first saw my surgery scars in the mirror, I remember saying to myself, forget about them, don’t look, ignore it and you won’t have to feel it. It was too upsetting to focus on the ways my body and life were changed.

But what I discovered from my own life and from talking with hundreds of cancer survivors, is that when you “shut down” the painful feelings, you can inadvertently shut down ALL your feelings, until you are left feeling “numb” or “frozen.”

PTSD can make it hard to feel loving feelings, pleasure in the things you enjoy, and even anger can be muted. In the process of protecting yourself from pain, all the feelings can become muted or shut off. And when this happens, you lose access to life force energy and important information about what you want from life and how to make decisions that will enrich your world.

I’m contributing a chapter on the benefits of yoga therapy in addressing emotional blunting in cancer survivors. Emotional healing requires a tender and compassionate look at what leads us to protect our psyches from pain and strategies for gently coming back into life and learning to feel more.

Fragmentation to Integration

May 14, 2020February 6, 2020 by Kelly Inselmann

“Everyone experiences fragmentation. But not everyone knows how to re-integrate and heal.”

Dr. Gurucharan Singh Khalsa

In the midst of treatment for cancer, I looked in the mirror and felt shocked at how changed I was on the outside. “This is me?” I had no hair, no eyebrows, pain and fatigue. Deep lines had appeared out of nowhere and there were dark circles under my eyes. I hadn’t spent much time in front of the mirror before, barely wearing makeup and not interested in the latest fashions. But now I did and I could see my soul.

When trauma occurs, you feel fragmented. Feelings get pushed aside in favor of survival. Parts of your experience are forgotten, the changes in your body create unfamiliar and unwelcome sensations. Your identity shifts as well as your sense of who you are.

As uncomfortable as it is, this fragmentation is a normal response to a traumatic, life threatening experience. The problem is that you don’t always get to re-integrate and integration is vital to healing.

In order to integrate, you have to acknowledge all aspects of your experience – changes in your body, relationships, undesirable memories, big feelings, and find ways to integrate them. When you’re integrated, you no longer feel numb, and have access to your emotions. You are more in charge of how you act and react and you can talk about your experience in a coherent way.
What creates a feeling of integration when you’re fragmented?

Feeling truly seen, heard and witnessed by another person is one way. And personal reflection through meditation invites your inner witness. When you include others, they are your witness. When you are meditating and/or being the observer of your own experience, you are your own witness.
Movement that gets your circulation moving, balances your energy and the hemispheres of the brain is another way. Yoga practice can also balance and integrate the functions of the brain stem (which controls survival) and the frontal lobe (which manages emotions and executive functioning).

Here’s a simple practice to acknowledge the many parts of your body and your Self:
http://www.kellyinselmann.com/monday-morning-videos/befriending-your-body/

In my upcoming workshop, we’ll explore the concept of fragmentation vs. integration and how integration helps you center and heal.

Registration now open for the workshop on February 27 and I hope you’ll join me.

Open to all! Cancer survivors, oncology professionals, mental health professionals, yoga teachers-anyone who is interested in experiencing the Kundalini Yoga approach to integration and healing.

https://www.eventbrite.com/e/yoga-talk-workshop-fragmentation-vs-integration-tickets-86746664609

Step One is Always the Same

May 14, 2020January 20, 2020 by Kelly Inselmann

In almost every healing tradition, the first step is always the same: Getting honest with yourself and others about what is really happening.

This is what we’ve been exploring in week one of my Healing Well: Reconnect to your LIFE course that began last Sunday. I’m so impressed with the depth of the sharing and the synchronicities, similarities, and differences being discovered in the group. Working together moves us all forward!

In the case of people going through a cancer experience, there can be a lot of support for being in denial and pressure to put on a happy face, even when the inner experience is far different. The pressure can come from family and friends who feel uncomfortable or awkward in the presence of strong feelings.

Sometimes, the pressure comes from within. You may believe that allowing yourself to acknowledge your fear or anger or grief will make you feel worse or somehow make the cancer grow.

I don’t subscribe to this. In my experience, it’s far more damaging the suppress your real feelings, for your body, your relationships, and your emotional healing.

You can take this very moment to check in with yourself about what you are feeling today. Look at the list on this post’s graphic. Do any of these resonated with you today? If not, what word better describes your experience of this moment?

Grow, Expand, Heal

December 10, 2019 by Kelly Inselmann

Do you get frustrated with physical changes or limitations after treatment for cancer?

Do “limitations” leave you feeling diminished?

Dr. Atul Gawande, physician and author of Being Mortal, addresses the question:

How do we move through the world and keep taking action once we are so aware of our limitations, vulnerabilities and imperfections?

“The first way that I think about it is through my public health work. It’s about the idea that we’re all so incredibly limited and yet there are ways that we string together and are almost unlimited as groups of people. It’s magic when that happens- when you all start pulling together and then you eradicate polio from the world, which we’re almost on the verge of doing.”

I love this wisdom from Dr. Atul Gawande where he describes how connection and community create a synergistic effect that give us the feeling of growth and possibility, where creativity and new ideas emerge, and where we keep each other motivated and accountable to our missions in life. This is when the seemingly impossible can happen. The point here is that as humans we are are all indeed imperfect, limited and uncertain of the future. When we lack connection we feel alone and more limited, but among a healthy community, we can help each other grow, expand, and heal.

In my Healing Well Course, we explore Principle #4: Finding the Gifts in Limitations. For some people, the cancer experience is the first time you find you can’t push past your limitations caused by illness or treatments. You are given an unavoidable opportunity to discover the potential gifts of limitations. How can you work with your limitations to benefit and even enhance your life? Are there family or friends with whom you need to practice setting healthy limits to prioritize your own healing?

For deeper healing to happen, to push beyond our limitations, I believe community is essential! I’m leading a free 40 day meditation challenge, a challenge by CHOICE and INSPIRATION, NOT obligation. You can participate as much or as little as you like and start anytime. Doing meditation in a supportive community and also taking the Healing Well Course are great ways to move beyond real and perceive limitations created by the “new normal.” I hope you’ll join us in the free 40 day meditation challenge here.

Let the Infinite In!

April 9, 2024December 5, 2019 by Kelly Inselmann

What if doing it together beats doing it alone? For deeper healing to happen,
I believe community is needed!

You are cordially invited to a daily meditation to take you through the Holiday season and beyond.

Yesterday, I was thinking about WHY I’m so attracted to group work even though I’m a MAJOR introvert. It’s because being part of an ongoing group means you get to cut through the small talk and get down to what you are really thinking and feeling. You can give and receive energy and support.

I was also thinking about my life and how off balance I have felt in 2019. I came to the same conclusion I always do: daily meditation practice is essential. It enhances my daily life, mental health and physical wellbeing.

With the topics of community and daily meditation on my mind, I taught my Wednesday Wellness Yoga class today where one woman shared how hard it is to do the practices on her own.

Practice IS hard to do on your own. There are SO many distractions. Creating space for yourself can be hard.

Someone else said she was setting an intention to “let the universe in” to a difficult situation that she knows she can’t control. As cancer survivors, we are all familiar with feeling like things are beyond our personal control.

And so as the class was lying in sivasana, I decided to initiate a 40 day community meditation. The class had a very positive response! And we’d love you to join in.

We are going to challenge each other to participate in a 40 day meditation. This is a challenge by CHOICE and INSPIRATION, NOT obligation. You can participate as much or as little as you like and start anytime. It’s completely free.

How will it work?

1.Each day, STARTING TODAY (or whenever you open this email), you are invited to begin and continue during the 40 day period as often as you can. Daily if possible!

If you decide to participate even for one day, reply to this email so I know to include you in the Facebook group (email and Facebook name) or in a group text if you don’t like Facebook (phone number and name)

2.We are going to be using the RA MA DA SA Sa Say So HUNG Meditation from the Kundalini Yoga tradition. This meditation is for healing through compassion and being open to miracles to work in your life – in other words, allowing the Universe in! The meditation is simple and melodic.

3.Suggested times for meditation: 3,7, or 11 minutes up to 31 minutes. You can set a timer.

4.You could also simply have the mantra playing as you work, drive or sleep.

———————————————————————————————————————————————
Step One:

Tune in with the Ong Namo Guru Dev Namo mantra 3 times. Here’s a link to remind you. http://www.kellyinselmann.com/monday-morning-videos/learn-and-practice-the-adi-mantra/
Set your intention for the day.

Step Two:

Use a version of the RA MA DA SA SA SAY SO HUNG meditation. You can look it up on Youtube for many different versions and melodies or you can use: http://www.kellyinselmann.com/monday-morning-videos/healing-meditation-for-eclipse-day-and-every-day/

Step Three

Sit for a few moments/minutes afterward and practice inviting the Universe in. Be open to healing and offer yourself compassion.

Step Four

Say “Sat Nam” to honor your True Self.

Step Five

If you wish, share in the facebook group or text that you completed your practice for the day. You can write up to a sentence or more or simply say “did it!” When you share that you have done your practice, you will inspire and remind others.

Step Six

Be kind to yourself. If you forget, just start again. If it’s not right for you, that’s ok!

Step Seven

Invite your friends. Anyone can join. The more the merrier!

RA MA DA SA SA SAY SO HUNG Meditation
http://www.kellyinselmann.com/monday-morning-videos/healing-meditation-for-eclipse-day-and-every-day/

Here’s more information on the meditation:

Translation:

Ra – Sun

Ma – Moon

Daa – Earth

Saa – Impersonal Infinity

Saa Say – Totality of Infinity

So – Personal sense of merger and identity

Hung – The infinite, vibrating and real.

This mantra taps into the energies of the sun, moon, earth, and the Infinite Spirit to bring deep healing. It is important to pull the navel point powerfully on the first Sa and on Hung. Note that the word Hung is not long and drawn out. Rather, it is clipped off forcefully as you pull in the navel. Chant one complete cycle of the entire mantra with each breath. Then deeply inhale and repeat. Remember to move the mouth precisely with each sound. Try to feel the resonance in the mouth and in the sinus area.

Mental Focus: Healing for yourself or someone else. Letting go of your need to control. Allowing the Infinite in.

Time: Continue chanting for 3, 7, 11 or 31 minutes.

To End: To end the meditation, inhale deeply and hold the breath, as you offer a healing prayer. Visualize the person you wish to heal as being totally healthy, radiant, and strong. See the person completely engulfed in a healing white light and completely healed. Then exhale and inhale deeply again, hold the breath, and offer the same prayer again. Exhale.

To complete, inhale deeply, stretch your arms up high, and vigorously shake out your hands and fingers for several seconds. Keep the arms up and hands shaking as you exhale. Repeat two more times and relax.

Let’s move through the holidays with as much consciousness and compassion as we can.

Connecting and the JoyBoots Community

May 14, 2020November 11, 2019 by Kelly Inselmann

From the moment you are born, you need others to survive and thrive. Community lifts you up when you are feeling low. And emotional isolation at a crucial time can be devastating, making a difficult situation feel even more traumatic. We all need community. Even those of us who are introverts by nature or who have an independent spirit.

Community sustained me when I went through cancer the first time. My baby daughter was 2 months old and I was still on a learning curve as a first time mom, sleep deprived, terrified, and furious that my life with my daughter was being hijacked by an urgent need for unwelcome treatments.

Friends brought food and offered a listening ear. Some could connect in spite of my pain and share their own challenges and there were no obstacles to our maintaining friendships. Maria Elena, a yoga friend I met while teaching a program volunteered to help me with my daughter and became our full-time nanny, life saver, and a person very dear to our family and my heart.

As many of you know, I’ve been revisiting the cancer experience personally, this time as a caregiver to my husband. As he continues treatment for colon cancer, I’m aware of how essential community is to me and how hard it can be to ask for help and accept limitations.

One way I’ve felt sustained by community is connecting with the members of my Wednesday Wellness Warriors yoga class, co-sponsored by Capital of Texas Team Survivor. After a temporary re-location over the summer, we have recently returned to South Austin, in the lovely FlowYoga studio in the Westgate Center.

I’m energized by the enthusiasm and commitment of this group and the way they show up for themselves and each other. I love how large the class is and how many different cancer experiences and stages are represented by this group of smart, caring, capable women, each open to healing in her own way.

I love my connections with the Joybooter community, a fierce and fascinating group of women. Knowing the backstories of so many inspiring women gave me the idea to begin a new series to share some of their wisdom and experience with the larger group.

Stay tuned…